People interpret scripture differently. I don't think there are two people on the planet who would find they have the exact same views on every verse in the Bible. We are unique and we have our own minds and experiences that shape our perceptions and understanding.
I believe that part of being separated from God is the confusion we experience because we are limited by our humanness from being able to fully experience or understand who God is. We don't like to feel confused. Confusion leads to fear that we're missing something. Fear makes us feel out of control. Too often in the church we decide to make certain unknowns 'known' by defining rules and understanding around things that God never intended us to get so wrapped up in.
I remember visiting my dad's side of the family when I was growing up and sitting with them at the dinner table while the adults would debate the topic of The Tribulation. The Tribulation is an idea that, in the end times, Christians will be heavily persecuted for their faith. Some people believe that God will snatch up all of the current Christians into heaven before The Tribulation begins and that because of that miraculous world event, many people will come to believe in God but will have to go through this horrific time of being abused, discriminated against, having no rights, and even being murdered, before God finally relents and wipes out all evil. Other people believe that Christians will not be rescued from The Tribulation, and still others think that maybe there is an answer somewhere in the middle. Of course, some believers don't believe in the idea of The Tribulation at all.
It was interesting to hear my dad and his siblings debate this topic. Some of them felt very strongly about their opinions and presented them as fact, others talked about teachers of the Bible who present reasons why it is actually wrong to believe anything but the conclusion they had come to. Some of them just weren't sure about the whole thing.
Who was right and who was wrong? Can any one of them prove in the world today what they thought they understood so clearly in the Scriptures? Is there really a black and white answer? Not feeling certain about something can leave us feeling too exposed and vulnerable. Our human tendency is to try to create peace and harmony in our souls by clarifying the unknown so that we don't feel afraid. Sometimes what we define as a 'known' for us, is not a 'known' for others. Sometimes we are taught our parents' 'knowns' and we grow up believing things to be certain having no idea that other people are not so certain. It is a strange thing, as a young adult, to suddenly realize that something you had no question about, is not that easy or clear for someone else.
Throughout history entire denominations and church affiliations have made decisions about what their black and white 'knowns' will be. They write value statements and membership agreements that clearly state what their beliefs are and the expectations they have for all who join their churches to believe in and abide by these 'knowns.' People feel safe when they surround themselves with others who all agree to be about the same things. People feel like the decisions they've made about what they 'know' to be true are validated when they join a church that has the same 'knowns.'
What, at first feels like inclusion and security inside of a group of believers who think like we think, can slowly fade into a club of exclusion, insecurity, and fear. This happens when we start to find more security in knowing that we know something, than the security we should be finding in knowing that all of us are loved by God and that God's truth cannot be undone by others who don't agree with us. When we start holding our beliefs as more sacred and more important than God's love for everyone, we begin to believe that we must make everyone believe and behave like we do. We forget that what was once a decision we made to define something a certain way might actually not be the only right way to define something. We feel threatened, defensive, and fearful when someone disagrees with us because we really liked the feeling we had in our gut that we had something all figured out and we didn't have to wonder about it anymore.
Churches can become places where people begin to police behaviors and beliefs so that the group as a whole conforms to the shared 'knowns' and everyone feels validated that they are doing it right. Church was intended to be a place of love and service and inclusion. It was never intended to be a place of required conformity. When behaviors become valued above all else, those who don't fall in line suddenly find themselves excluded from the group. They find themselves alone, isolated, feeling unloved and unworthy. Worst of all, they find themselves unwelcome in the Church. This is not the example I see from Jesus in the New Testament. I see a man who spent his ministry breaking down the 'knowns' and rebuking those who held the 'knowns' so sacred. I see a man who sought out those who didn't conform to the rules and embracing them and telling them they were loved by Truth Itself. I see a man who gave his life for ALL, including ALL who didn't look like, sound like, dress like, believe like, or worship like he did.
Please don't hear me say that I don't think there aren't any absolutes. I just don't think any of us should get so certain in our thinking that we think we are the ones who've figured out exactly what those absolutes are and everyone else deserves to be marginalized until they fall into line. If you have chosen faith in God stay humble enough to remember that you might not have it all right. You might not truly 'know' all the truths. And even if you do know something that really is true, remember that the highest commandment that God gave was to love God and to love others. Love comes first.
Christians in America have gotten so wrapped up in the sacredness of their 'knowns' that they have come to believe it is their duty to force compliance on everyone through our government. They truly believe that they are doing this for the best and good of all, but because they are making these laws based, ultimately, out of the fear that drove them to the absolutes they have claimed, they fear everyone who doesn't believe or behave the way they do. This fear leads them to know that first, they must be able to protect their rights so they must be free to own the weapons they will need if the majority decides to go against their 'knowns.' Jesus did not model this. He did not assume he needed to be able to defend himself. He also never said we shouldn't own weapons, but when his day came to face those who didn't believe as he did, he did not call for all around him to take up weapons and defend him. He remained humble and calm. He leaned into love and not fear. He sacrificed the desire to force everyone to understand his truth in the moment for the eternal impact he could have by sacrificing himself in Love instead.
Christians have also chosen the 'knowns' that feel the most affirming to their way of life and they band together to make those 'knowns' required for all. They believe that if everyone will just comply because they are forced to, then everyone will be better people. They forget that compliance doesn't create believers. Compliance doesn't offer salvation. And, compliance will never happen across the board. We were created individually and have lived unique experiences because God, in infinite wisdom and creativity, knows that God's glory can only be revealed in the infinite variety of life and love that is displayed throughout the world. And, every single person is imperfect so we will all mess up, choose selfishness, forget to love well and decide to live out of fear rather than love far more often than we should.
When Christians decide to police things they can't ultimately control, and then decide to alienate and shut out those who don't submit to the rules, they create battles that cannot be won. Change that matters does not happen with lots of rules that say 'don't.' Change happens when individuals say 'how can I help?' Outlawing abortion doesn't stop abortions from happening. Finding out why abortions are happening and finding ways to help women so that abortions are not needed stops abortions from happening. Telling people not to have sex before marriage doesn't keep that from happening either. Showing each individual their worth as a whole person who is loved and valued and who is more than their bodies, helps them to make wise decisions about what is best for them instead of making decisions out of desperation for connection that ends up being about nothing more than instant gratification. Assuming that people who worship a faith other than Christianity are evil doesn't make them evil, nor does it make them interested in learning about our faith. Calling someone evil because they don't think they way we do is something evil we do to others.
We discredit our faith when we believe we need to force compliance but teach a message of grace. We make our faith something to be feared and distrusted when we fear and distrust everyone who does not share our faith. We build walls that exclude and are founded in fear when we think that behaviors indicate the conditions of people's hearts and that we are charged with the responsibility to change those behaviors without first caring for those hearts.
Love meets people where they are.
Love listens to people's stories.
Love is curious and asks questions.
Love assumes the best of people and their intentions.
Love looks for common ground.
Love trusts God with outcomes.
Love values people and relationships.
Love seeks to follow Jesus' example.
Love includes everyone.
Love does not seek to defend itself at the cost of others.
Love does not need for everyone to look at behave one certain way.
Love does not need a Christian government to spread it's gospel message.
It takes a lot of selflessness to love well. It takes a different kind of love and energy to decide to seek to bring change through loving people in the mess of relationship over attempting to force their compliance through laws and legalism. Trying to force an entire nation to comply to the 'knowns' of a few (who might not have it all right) does not create unity or love. It does not bring about the desired outcome. In fact, it only serves to create more divisiveness, more fear, more broken relationships. Being a part of the side that perpetuates so much fear and judges so harshly just doesn't sound to me like being a part of the side that Jesus is on.
